I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
