So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
