You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
