you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
