This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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