there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
