She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Rumble strips road head = magical
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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