He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
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