He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize
