There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
