Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
