JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i just sent this text using only my big toe
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
