Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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