She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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