K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I have demons in me.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
