Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
