if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
