I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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