DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
