Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
it glows. i had to have it.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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