new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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