end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
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