Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize