i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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