No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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