You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
