So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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