Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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