have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize