Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
