I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
