I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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