No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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