Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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