I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Randomize
