do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
