why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
