and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
