just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
