"it" just moved
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
