i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
