Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
