Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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