I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize