how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
