Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
