I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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