I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Randomize