my vag is so smooth its legendary
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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