I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
